Saturday, March 31, 2012

Racism, Part 1

I live in the South. I was not raised in the South, though if you ask Northerners they will say I was, and Southerners will say I wasn't. No one really knows what to do with West Virginia. It is partly above and partly below the Mason Dixon Line, which is supposed to be the watermark to prove where you belong.
So it is from this mixed background that I now attempt to remark on a subject that some would say I have no business remarking on: racism.
For most of the country it was a topic revisited this week with the shooting of Trayvon Martin in Florida, but in my little town in East Carolina it is a topic that is weekly in the newspaper. I must admit that it has baffled me for many years now. In this part of the country, black people or African-Americans or people of color, have a loud public voice. They often comment that whatever is happening...Board of Education decisions, zoning, drug charges, police protection... decisions are made according to race. The general population, or at least the loudest population, believes that whites are out to get them, and all decisions are made in Whites' favor.
Because of this, our school system is still trying to meet desegregation requirements. Whenever the Board tries to reshuffle the kids, everyone goes up in arms. When they try to leave the kids in neighborhood schools everyone is upset that the "White Schools" are better. There seems to be no way to satisfy government requirements and the entire community.
Though I agree that at one time this was an issue in this part of the world, it is no longer. When the schools with a larger black population don't score well on tests, it is blamed on white schools getting better teachers. When black kids are bussed into the "good" schools, the test scores drop. One might look at that and say that race plays a part in intelligence. I don't see it that way. Economics is what is playing a part.
Like I said, I grew up in WV. You could run down the middle of the road for a week and still not run into a black person. BUT, you can go to a school where test scores are low, or you can move kids around and test scores will change at the good schools. What is the difference? Not race, but economics.
When you expect poor kids to score as well as rich kids, you are fooling yourself. Kids from privileged backgrounds have an unfair advantage. They have parents who are educated. They go to summer camps, museums, attend library programs, travel, take special extra-curricular classes, play instruments, and have much attention lavished upon them. They then have all of the experiences that help them achieve in life and on tests. This is true of black, white, green, and purple kids. Experiences equal achievement.
Of course there are exceptions to this. There are some kids who just don't have the mental capacity to achieve high marks, and there are some kids who, despite their backgrounds, will achieve high marks. But most definitely it has nothing to do with race.
So instead of the loud, useless conversation about which schools are better, the conversation needs to turn to discovering a way to help parents achieve so that their kids can too.

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Midnight Showings

It seems in the last several years the "in" thing with movies has become the midnight showing. Last summer, I allowed #1 to go to a midnight showing with two friends to see Harry Potter. It was the last in the series, and #1 was 14 1/2 years old. I did not think he was old enough to go to a midnight show  unchaperoned, but since he was with two friends I allowed it. I took them, and then I slept in the van while they watched the movie. That way, I thought, if something happens, I am very close by, and they can come right out. It went well...and set a precedent.
So this past weekend The Hunger Games came out, and again there was a midnight showing. Many of #1's friends were going to attend, but he never asked me if he could go. #2 had been asked by some of the friends if he would like to go, but I told him he isn't old enough for a midnight movie. On Thursday, the day of the midnight show, #2 says to #1, "I hear there are still some tickets available at the Carmike." And that's when it started.
I suppose since I didn't say anything, #1 took it to mean that he would be allowed to go. When we got home, he asked his dad if he would pick him up from the show. Hubby looked at me and asked what was going on. Anyway, this went on for a long time, and I "lectured" #1 about taking risks. He didn't ask to go to the movie because he thought I would say no. Now he couldn't get a ticket to the show with his friends, and I didn't want him going alone at midnight. If he would have taken the risk, he might have gotten what he wanted, or he might not have, but at least he would know. Without taking the risk all he got was nothing.
His response? I got a bigger lecture by not asking than if I had asked! Maybe that will teach him!

Anyway, we ended up letting him go to the theater near us that still had tickets. He didn't get to go with a friend, so I don't think it was as fun as he had hoped, but at least he can face his friends with movie knowledge. His dad took him and then came home to sleep on the couch until 2:00 A.M. to go get him. I woke up at 1:45, so I went to get him instead and let Hubby go on to bed. There were lots of other parents picking up kids too. I think we need a new fad: 7PM showings.

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Wash Day

Thursdays are "Wash Day" at my house. I wash all of the laundry, clean house, and wash the dog in the evening. This Thursday she got her bath a little early. I had mopped the hallway while Hubby was gone, and when he came home, he let the mutt in. She had gone for a walk with #1, but didn't stay with him. Her feet were covered in mud! She was lying on my newly mopped floor with her extremely muddy feet rubbing all over the hallway.
I put her out, but when #1 came back from his walk, in she came again. She knew she would get in trouble for it, so she hid in the diningroom. "Did you let the dog in when you came in?"
"Yeah."
"NOOO!!!" and out she went.
So I washed the sunroom/mudroom, and then stuck her in the tub out on the porch. As I washed her back and belly everything seemed normal, but when I lifted her feet to see if the mud had soaked off, it was still plastered to her. That was when I decided that it wasn't mud. I think it was concrete. Ugh.
I had heard a large truck earlier in the day, the sort of sound of a truck rolling off concrete... I didn't go over to the neighborhood to check if my suspicions were valid, but I am pretty sure someone is probably not happy over there. I will have to keep a closer eye on that dog.
I have unsuccessfully tried to get rid of her over the years, but the longer I have her, the more I think she is good for me. She is the constant reminder that I am a sinful sap myself, and I make people unhappy with me too. I am glad that God washes me over and over instead of letting me wallow in the sin of cement that clings to my feet.

Friday, March 23, 2012

And the Winner Is...

I took two teams to the Coastal Envirothon this week. This is my third year to coach a team, and we did well. It has been a nerve wracking couple of months for the middle school team, as two members left us and a third nearly did. You have to have three members to make a team, so I was very concerned for my #2. The two who are left with him are young, 11 years old, and inexperienced. #2 took over as team leader and led them to victory! They placed #1 in our region!! Besides that the registration that I took care of online back in JANUARY had not gone through and when we got there we weren't even registered! My nerves were shot.
 #1 had to participate since I am teaching this as part of Environmental Science for high school. You can see below how very excited he was about it. (lower left corner, yawning) This was my first year to have a high school team. The test was very hard, but they managed to place sixth, so they still get to go to the State Competition April 20-21.

 The actual competition day is not a whole lot of fun, but a few of the stations provide some hands-on activities. Above, there was a snake at the middle school Wildlife station, and below, there were some fish activities in the high school Aquatics division. It was nothing compared to what they have done all year in class, but at least it woke them up a bit.

So now we prepare for the next competition. #1 is singing with joy, and my writing is laden with sarcasm.

Friday, March 16, 2012

A Week in Review

Sometimes I dream about what it must be like to be a stay-at-home homeschool mom.The wonderful times you spend with your kids, molding their minds, sharing classic literature, creating works of art...it must be fantastic.
Monday:  Make sure something is in the crockpot before heading out the door, because the only question anyone in my house ever asks is what are we eating. It is the most important thing to learn evidently. Teach about 30 kids besides my own.
Tuesday: Don't worry about dinner today because it is Guy's Night Out. Head to History Club with extra work to do while we wait afterward. Go bowling with 4-H. Take the younger kid to the orthodontist. It still isn't time for him to get braces, about 3-5 more teeth to lose first. Back home to hand off the kids, and then head out to speak at the home school support meeting.


Wednesday: Dye my child's head blue. Yes, blue. Dinner was breakfast with pancakes and bacon. Also went to see the radiologist, who did a "smashing" job by the way. Everything seems to be fine since no one called me to come back yet. Made some changes to the Easter Skit, and met with the youth for the first read through and practice.
Thursday: LOTS of laundry. The bedding needed to be cleaned, so it was more laundry than usual, but what a wonderful day for the clothesline! Afternoon was spent going to the dump, stopping by a car dealership to see if we won anything in their contest, dropping off #1 at the radio station to read to the blind, and dropping #2 off at Give 2 the Troops to help our soldiers. What did I do in my free time? Grade other kids' papers of course! And I know you are wondering...ravioli with meat sauce, salad, zucchini, and garlic bread.
Friday: Finish the laundry that I couldn't get to yesterday. Grade more papers, make tests for my high schooler, and of course fix dinner. I'm thinking Pizza Delivery!

So does anyone know where I can find a stay-at-home homeschooling mom? I would like to meet one.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Chicken Lady

"Would you like a hundred chickens?"
I tell you, I get asked the strangest questions. I was speaking at the homeschool support meeting Tuesday evening, and afterward one of the ladies came up to ask me a question. I thought it would be about the topic, teaching writing, but no. She asked if I would ike a hundred chickens. What in the world?!
A friend of theirs has 100 chickens and wants to get rid of them. She is offering to give them away...free. So if you want a free chicken I can put you in touch with the right people!
Yesterday was quite warm here, and I turned off the heat lamp on my chicks. I FORGOT!!! So they went through the night without heat! I lost two of them; eight are left and seem to be fine. I thought I was losing three, but one perked up again once I got the heat on them. It just makes me sick to think of them out there freezing to death. It only got down to about 49 degrees, but for a chick that is just too cold. Sigh.

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Good Morning Sunshine

It was sudden and vicious, this indignant angry burst. I could feel my hands clench and my blood pressure rise, but why was I so angry?
"They have to learn to be responsible sometime," my husband stated. "Are you going to call and wake them at college?"
"Fine, I won't ever wake them  up again!" I blurted.
It is a conversation we have had before, but I continue to wake my children in the mornings. This time I decided to figure out what exactly was making me angry. Then I realized...
When I go wake my boys in the morning, I walk into their rooms, sit on the bed, brush their hair away from their faces, and talk for a minute or two. It is a precious time for me. Mostly I am not allowed to touch #1 anymore; it embarrasses him. But at 7:30 in the morning, wrapped up in his comforter and smelling of sleep, he will be my sweet child once again, and I love it. Going into #2's room, I am often asked for a hug or a kiss, and I rub his legs or scratch his back. My little imp returns with some joke or comment, and I remember when their lives, and mine, were simpler.
I am not ready to give that up. A person can learn to wake to an alarm in just a few days, so I am not concerned about early college classes. When the time comes, I will give them an alarm clock lesson, but for now I will travel into a sweeter time and place.
------------
This morning I woke #2 with, "Good morning. It's Wednesday and you DON'T have to go to OM!" We are all very happy for that. He asked if he could have 15 minutes more of sleep to celebrate.
Odyssey of the Mind went well for our groups. #2's team and the elementary team won fourth place, the other middle school team placed third, and the high schoolers came in first! It was fun while it lasted, but we are all ready for the break.

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Winterfest

 As I have said before, February was a terribly busy month. So you are just now getting some of the pictures. In mid-February I helped chaperone the youth at Winterfest in Gatlinburg, TN. This was my fourth year to go, and I really enjoy it. The kids are awesome, and the event itself is fabulous.
 This year the topic was Spiritual Disciplines, and they did a super job of using technology to bring it down to the kids' level. Above are some of the topics we covered over the short time that we were there.
 A good amount of time is spent visiting with each other as we wait in line. After our first year, we realized it is more fun if you take a friend. So ever since my boys have taken friends with them. Above is #1 and below is his weekend buddy. They are in some classes together, 4H, and other events. Both are preacher's kids, so I think they have a little in common there too.

 #2 is still my buddy a lot of the time. He did take a friend, pictured below, but he also spent some time with me on the sky lift. Not because I wanted to go on it, but because his friend backed out after the ticket was already purchased. The tickets are usually something like $15, so we never go, but because of President's Day weekend, the tickets were $1. So I rode along. Oh My Word!! In the last couple of years I have noticed that I can't go as high as I used to. Well it is official, I AM AFRAID OF HEIGHTS.
It was another good time. Of course we returned worn out and ready to sleep, but that never gets to happen. Now Spring Break is over, we are back in school, and there are only 8 weeks left of school. At least that seems to be a light at the end of my tunnel.

Monday, March 12, 2012

High Society

I was picking up sticks one day over Spring Break and out of the corner of my eye I saw the goats go running by. They were followed by the chickens. We hadn't mown the yard yet, and the grass was higher than in the pasture, so I thought the goats would enjoy running around a bit. Then I wondered, what must the neighbors think of these hillbilly bumpkins?
I do know that most people don't think farm animals should wander through your yard, but they are so wonderful to watch. The goats scamper and head butt each other, the chickens chase the returning butterflies, and the dog thinks she's the boss of them all.
So I was telling all of this to my husband while we were out on a date. Again I wondered with him if people think I don't know how to behave in high society. Then, while taking a spoonful of my soup, I splashed hot soup in my eye and about cried. I wear glasses!! How is that even possible!? Perhaps I'm not as high society as I think.

Sunday, March 11, 2012

Honestly Officer

#1 is a driver now. He has been driving since February 28... as a permit holder anyway. I am in the car with him giving helpful advice, like "AAAHHHH!!!! What are you thinking?!"
 It was scary the first few days, but it is getting better. At first he couldn't keep it between the lines in the lane, but now he pretty much does. Also, he has no concept about slow down; he either goes or stops. Slow down just doesn't exist. And the last thing? He doesn't seem to be aware that anyone else is on the road besides himself. Look in the rearview mirror? Why? Side mirrors? Aw Shucks Ma, why would I do that?
But he is pretty proud of his picture. Just hope he doesn't have to ever show it.
-----
His dad hasn't driven with him yet. Maybe he will tell a different story.

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Allergy Meds and Sleep

 Just over a week ago I got some new critters. A friend was driving over to a town to get some new chicks, and they had the kind I like, so I asked her to get a few for me. Ten is a few when you are speaking of chicks. Now, we have had a very mild winter, rarely even getting down to freezing at night, so I thought March would be fine for going ahead with the chick idea. Of course, just a couple days after they arrive, we have the coldest weather all winter, and I had to bring the chicks in at night.
I was having allergy problems last night, so I took an allergy pill partway through the night. Boy will that mess with your dreams. I dreamed that these little chicks were being taunted by "Tom", the cartoon cat, and I was so drugged I couldn't do anything but hiss at him as he slowly ate my chicks. I could hear the bones crunching. Ugh.

This is a panda preparing for an Odyssey of the Mind competition. It was supposed to be Spring Break for us here this week, but the teams had to do a lot of last minute prep and so the week was spent at practices. #2 and his dad got up at 5:30 this morning to get ready to leave. The competition is about 1 1/2 hours away.

 The kids have worked all school year on  getting this ready. Their problem was to make a skit that solves two problems and helps the community. They made up a skit about pandas being poisoned. I watched it last Wednesday, and I was rolling laughing. They were hilarious with what all they thought up. This is my poor panda in jail below. He uses his great-grandmother's tin cup to bang on the bars!
 They had to practice outside. The competition is at a school, so I hope it goes well. They should be used to dealing with a lot more distractions, like wind, sun, a cat that sprays, etc. Good luck Buddy!
Hubby is the one who took #2 to competition, but he is also there as a coach. He coached the high school team this year. Our high school son did not participate, so KUDOS to my Hubby for stepping out of his boundaries and helping the kids out.

Friday, March 09, 2012

Strange Dreams

I often dream strange things. Last week I dreamed that a bear was walking around in the subdivision I lived in. I showed the prints to a woman who was walking her dog. She became very upset and notified the community watch people. As I kept walking I ran into Martha, a fellow Envirothon coach. She was taking her team on a hike and had made fake prints for the kids to look for. I had to go tell the neighborhood patrol to relax; there was no bear. Envirothon Competition One is in less than two weeks. It's hard to tell what I will dream between now and then.
Night before last I was irritated with my in-laws because they chose to take some college kids to Hawaii instead of taking us or my brother-in-law's family. Instead we went to some pirate restaurant and had the special...hot cornflakes with red beans and milk poured over the top. It was as disgusting as it sounds.
At least last night went a little better. Leonardo DiCaprio was going to make me a cherry pie, but I started coughing and woke myself up, so I don't know how that turned out.
Mostly I just want a really restful night's sleep.

Tuesday, March 06, 2012

Validation

My boys and I are leading a new 4H club in the county. Actually, it was a club that started last year and fizzled, so we are taking over in hopes of reviving it. Today was our first meeting. I sort of led the meeting and an activity, and my boys helped the kids to manage themselves through it. Then they split the group up and each of my boys led a smaller group in an activity.
While they led the smaller groups, I met with some parents to answer questions, get paperwork, etc. One parent had lots of questions, but she didn't seem to believe my answers.
How much commitment will this be at home? None, unless your child shows over time that she wants to do some of it at home.
How much does it cost? Nothing.
So you will meet here once a month and I don't have to do anything else? Correct.
Why are you doing this when you don't have any kids in this school? Well, for the kids. And for my kids. And... because I believe in 4H.
She just stared at me. Stunned.
"You are a very generous person," she finally managed. Then she went to meet my boys and talked with them a few seconds. She came back and said, "You have done something good. I know as parents we often question ourselves, but I want to tell you, you have obviously done something right. Good job."
Music to my ears.

Sunday, March 04, 2012

Who's Your Daddy?

I just watched part of a movie that was on tv. I don't know the name of it, but it was about an eleven-year-old black girl who was cruelly raped, beaten, and nearly killed. Her father shot the two men who did it. Of course they were white, and it took place in the South. A fair trial was impossible.
The final summation made by the defense attorney was to have you imagine what the girl went through, and then to imagine that she was white. I supppose that would help some people, but I would rather ask, what would you want your daddy to do if you were the little girl?
I would want to know he cared enough to risk it all in order to save me. I do not think it is right to kill others, in any situation, but I do think it is justified to have a sense of security, of value, and of importance. I would not ask my daddy to kill those horrible men, but I would somehow expect him to make some sort of effort that would lead to justice.
Perhaps I am wrong. Perhaps there are times when killing is justified. Perhaps there are times when there is no other way to bring about justice than by killing. Perhaps that is why my Daddy killed himself in order to save me.

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son; that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16

Saturday, March 03, 2012

Suffering and Hope

The creation waits in eager expectation for the Sons of God to be revealed. For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and be brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God. We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth, right up to the present time. Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.    Romans 8:19-25

I volunteered at the domestic abuse shelter again last night. There was a young woman who, at least for that hour, was the epitomy of this verse. The product of an incestuous relationship, she was kicked out at 16 because she reminded her mother too much of her father. Homeless and helpless, she fended for herself as best she could. She met an older man and became his wife. After giving him children and years of her life, this man decided to begin abusing her. Fearing for her safety and that of her children and unborn child, she fled.
Certainly she has the right to be bitter. She was not.
She wants more out of life. She wants to be successful, to help others, to be the parent she never had. She has HOPE. I pray that she has the patience that it will take for her to accomplish this great feat. Please say a prayer for her now, and for all of the creation that groans and cries out to the Lord.