Tears Fall Like Rain

Yesterday was another rough day in the life of a high schooler. Poor #1 is having trouble with Algebra, though his problems are not limited to that alone. Mostly, I believe, he is having problems with discipline and self-control. I told him Friday that he would need to do work over the weekend. He had a field trip on Friday, and his grandparents were coming to visit for a few days on Monday. If he wanted time to visit with them, then it would mean doing some work on Saturday and Sunday. He did part of an Algebra lesson and took his Composition test. Not enough. So yesterday as the rain fell, so did his spirits. He needed to complete a presentation for Geography, do a bunch of schoolwork, and do it all well. Tears flowed, especially after he realized I couldn't allow him to go to the SGA meeting. We talked through why he couldn't go- Algebra is more important- and then I told him that if he couldn't keep up with his part in the play and school, it would be the play that would have to go. I didn't realize how much that had been a punch in the gut until an hour later when he asked if I would be taking him out of 4H after he was taken out of the play. And yet I am having the same problem. I don't like this tough parent discipline stuff. I want to let him do all of the fun things, because it is more fun for me to have him happy. But I know that his happiness in the future is dependent on getting through these classes. So for now I make a harder decision to have easier decisions in the future. I just hope it isn't too far in the future.

Cleaning House

I bought a new mop today. I need to finish mopping the house, and I don't plan on doing it on my hands and knees again. Our whole house has hardwood floors, which I love because I know when they are clean, however I also know when they are dirty. Wouldn't it be nice if you could see your behavior as clearly as you can see a floor? Yesterday I had to call down some of my favorite boys in the whole world because they were being mean spirited and bullying. It made my stomach turn to hear what they were doing. Satan can walk into your house and muddy up the floors faster than a puppy on the loose! Now I have to clean the rest of the house. The boys are upstairs working on their domain. The downstairs livingroom is now called "Mom's Paradise", but somehow I just vacuumed Starburst papers and food bits from the couch cushions. I don't eat in here, so I guess someone is having a party when I am not around! --------- Today is the 6 year anniversary of when we received the call to come minister here. We had been living in Texas for the four years before that. My boys were born in Philadelphia, and then moved to WV for a year. They spent their preschool years in Texas, and have been in East Carolina since then. It is amazing how quickly time has gone. We hope to be able to stay here at least until our boys are finished with school, if not longer. I know that sounds odd for homeschoolers, but both Hubby and I grew up in one place and want that stability for our boys. In today's world where families don't live nearby, it is important to us that they have some sort of sense of belonging. Even so, my parents were down two weeks ago, and Hubby's are coming down next week. The boys do have strong relationships with their grandparents, just like we did.

Slowing Down

I have been learning about "Margin" in my Wednesday evening small group. No, it isn't a butter substitute, but recognizing the need to leave extra...extra time, extra money, extra energy, etc. This past Wednesday we were especially looking at time. The speaker said that if you will give God your schedule, and put Him at the beginning of it, God will make sure that everything that needs to be done gets done. So this morning after I woke and started my morning prayers as usual, I noticed that I was beginning the day stressed with all that needed doing before we headed out on our day long field trip. I decided that even though I really didn't feel that I had time for devotion right then, I needed to give God the first place, first importance, rightful spot. I headed to the living room, said a little prayer, and started my reading for the day. After I finished I started into all of the things that had to get done. I did not have enough time to get them done, but I went after it anyway. Strangely, each time I finished something on my list, I would look at my watch and only a few minutes would have passed. After a while I kept looking just to see if it were really only a few minutes. Somehow God slowed time for me. I was able to finish what needed doing, AND I sat down to eat breakfast. I remembered everything I needed for the day, got all of the chores done, and was relaxed. Guess what I will be doing tomorrow morning.

Bubble Gum on My Face

Our assignment this week is to tell at least three people what we are thankful for. I have already shared with one person, so I guess you are number two. I am thankful that God thought I was worth something. Not like, "I found a quarter in the parking lot, maybe I can use it in the cart at Aldi", but really worth something. When Jesus prayed in the Garden to not have to die for all of Humanity, it was me that God reminded Jesus about. And Jesus said, "Got it. I love her. She's mine. I'll do it." And what really makes me thankful? I know I'm not even worth a penny stuck in chewed up bubble gum melted to the bottom of my chicken manure covered shoe.

Scheduling Happy Time

We had to have a sit down with the teachers and student last week. It seems that #1 was doing his work with great speed but not with great accuracy. We had to give him a schedule: Algebra 8-8:50, Biology 9-9:50, Comp 10-10:50, etc. At the close of the conference, his father asked if he had any questions. "Why does school have to be so boring?!" I guess he isn't enjoying the structure. Of course I have the same issues...Why does housework, grading papers, shopping, writing reports, paying bills, ironing, whatever I am doing and don't want to be doing, have to be so boring? I can look for the enjoyment that I get out of each...pride in a job well done, saving money, looking good...but sometimes I can get overwhelmed with everything else that is on my plate and forget to look for the happy parts. #1 has a 10 minute break scheduled between subjects, so last Friday he asked his brother to "fight" with him for 10 minutes. They bought Nerf swords not long ago and they like to duel with them. #2 was not being agreeable since he had school work to finish or he couldn't go to a birthday party. Finally I said, "I'll fight you. Come on!" So out we went with the swords. Then he hit me with it! "You don't hit me with it!" "That's what we do! We hit each other." "Well you guys are stupid. Those things hurt!" He just laughed at me. By the end he had my adrenaline up, and I was hitting him back. It ended up being a happy part of my day. I'll have to remember that beating children can add pleasure to a stressful day, of course that child is 5 feet 10 1/2 inches now and can whup me if he takes a mind to. Better take on the little one next time!

Where Is Strawberry Island?

Today was Geography Club again. #1 had New Zealand, and #2 had Easter Island. Mommy had a mess. Yes, what I learned in geography today is that you do NOT put frozen strawberries in a food processor. I was making the topping for New Zealand Pavlova cake. I needed to chop up some strawberries, and I thought, "Oh, this will be quick if I just throw the berries in the processor." I filled the container and turned it on. The lid flew off from the pressure of frozen berries being banged against the container! It was banging so hard I couldn't get the machine to turn off!! "Well," I thought, "it should be ok to turn it back on. Surely the worst is past and it will chop up those babies now!" I held the lid on just in case, though. The measuring cup on top flew up nearly to the ceiling and came crashing down on the counter. Strawberry bits and pieces were splattered all over the kitchen walls, counters, appliances, floor, and me...in a nice white shirt. Lovely. The dessert tasted yummy though, and I have had requests to make it again. A little bright spot in the red juice of disaster.

A Happy Heart

There are two churches in our neighborhood that are discussing joining forces. They used to be one church many years ago, but they acted like sinful humans instead of like Christ-Followers, and the church split. Now after these many years, when probably no one even realizes that they used to be one, they are talking of getting together. It makes my heart so happy. Can you imagine the impact that could have on this community? If you were interested in going to a church, but were fed up with the hypocritical religiosity of churches, wouldn't you try a church like that? I am sure such news will make the paper, and it will intrigue some people. It speaks well for the churches and for the leaders of the churches who have decided that doing what God wills is more important than any human will. Hallelujah and AMEN! -------------- My older child is on his first "car date" tonight. Not really. At 13 1/2 he is too young for a date, but he has gone out with a group of friends, and they are riding with the 17 year old ring leader. She isn't driving far- maybe 3-4 miles- and they are going to a well-chaperoned party, but still it is his first "Teen Thing" in my opinion. #2 is at a sleepover birthday party, and Hubby is teaching his Weekend College course. So what does that leave me doing on a Friday night? Well after I delivered dinner to the shelter, I came home and watered and fed everything. Now that I have updated everyone, I will head to the pantry for the broom and mop. Yes, that's right! My exciting Friday night plans involve cleaning house. I really know how to live it up!

Checking In in Less Than a Week

I started a new medication on Sunday for my arthritis. I don't like it. Like all medications it comes with lots of cautions and warnings, but to read that if I intend to stay on it I need to wear an id bracelet makes me nervous. On top of that it sends me to the bathroom A LOT. I have lost 5 pounds in 4 days just "making water" as my Philadelphia students would say. The medicine tastes terrible and I don't think it is helping much. I go to the doctor on Friday and I think I will nix this prescription. Yesterday was Geography Club and we ate lunch together. There was shrimp, lamb, salad, chicken, salmon, ANZAC cookies, and our two creations, Lamingtons and Apricot and Banana Crumble. It was nice to sit and visit with my friends while the kids ate and played with their friends. It was encouraging to hear that the kids in our Thursday classes are all feeling a bit overwhelmed to have so much "work" to do through the week. They have had it easy in school until now and are having some growing pains as they morph into high schoolers. Along with the Composition class I am teaching the high schoolers, I am also teaching a 6-8 grade class and a 3-5 grade class. It is a lot to prepare for and involves a lot of creativity. I have finally decided that I need to go check out some writing books and let someone else be creative for a while. So the boys and I are heading to the library after lunch. They will take their work and study while I look for resources. Another day not at home. On the bright side, #1 has been showing some signs of maturation. I noticed they were out of toilet paper in the bathroom this morning. I asked him if he had used it all, "No." But then he went ahead and refilled it!!! Wow! He also asked me last week if he could read some more of his Civics book even though it would mean reading ahead. Then he asked if he could read a book I am assigning next year! This year in Religion I am assigning a book of the Bible and then after it is finished I assign a "regular" book. #1 and I just finished reading The Bronze Bow. He said he liked it because it made the Bible stories come to life and seem more real. I told Hubby about it and he suggested reading The Book of God. It is several inches thick and retells the story of the Bible as a historical fiction story. I told #1 about it and showed it to him, but explained that I thought we would save it for next year. He thought about that for a while and then asked if he could read it this year anyway. He thought it sounded interesting. Hmm. Maybe there is hope for him yet. Auditions are this evening for Sleeping Beauty. We took #1's head shot this morning after his shower. I hope it goes well for him, but as always, I hope he does NOT get a big part. It means a lot of practice sessions if he does.

Faster than a Speeding Train

Like a speed train rushing through the channel, my life has been going fast and underground. I can't believe it has been a week since I last blogged. I know Auntie is getting anxious to know what we have been doing down here. School. That about sums it up. Last night at 9:00 we were still grading math with #2. There have been so many interruptions...parents visiting, meetings scheduled, clubs and co-ops...that we have gotten behind on things. So last night as we got back home at 10:15 from picking up #1 at a meeting, I told the boys that school would start at 7 a.m. this morning. WHAT!!! screamed me ( and them). Yes, we have such a hectic schedule today that I thought we better get it out of the way. So we were baking lamingtons and banana and apricot crumble this morning for our geography club. I took some pictures and hope to upload them soon for you. We did have a lovely visit with my parents though. We very gratefully received half a beef from them. They give us meat for our Christmas present, but this year we seemed to go through it faster than ususal. Maybe it was the two growing boys living with me. Anyway, we have had taco salad and beef stew and are loving having some good meat to eat. I had been feeding the family fish since I think of all the purchased meats it is the least contaminated with steroids, chemicals, fat, etc. I do like red meat though. Thanks Mom and Dad. We also had a campfire cookout with 4-H on Friday at our house. I love getting together with friends and sitting around a fire. It was great to sit and relax for a while. We were looking at introducing a new family to our club, so we did a little "try out". I'm not sure what they thought of us when I asked the 6 year old if her mother has a home school cage. She said no. I'm not so sure. Every good homeschooler has one....for the mother to lock herself in and eat lots of chocolate!

Sudoku Wisdom

I enjoyed my night off last night to forget about all that has to be accomplished today. I was working a Sudoku puzzle this morning and getting to where I couldn't find any new numbers when #2 came in for help with Bible and Science class. I stopped to help him for half an hour and then headed back to my puzzle. I suddenly saw things that I hadn't before. Taking a break and changing directions for a while can actually make a smoother road ahead. I will have to remember that when I get frustrated.

Traditions

Labor Day in the Northeast means so much more than it does in the Southeast. I remember when we lived in PA that Labor Day meant the end of summer, for real. The pools closed because it was too chilly to keep them open anyway, school started back, fall harvests began; it truly was not summer any longer. It is still summer where we live. We are still comfortable in shorts, the pool is still open, and you can still get a lot out of the garden. School started back in August, because it isn't any different than September, so why wait? Sunday in Bible class we were discussing traditions and their value. Some traditions mark the passage of time, like Labor Day picnics, and others tell who we are, like Easter celebrations. Traditions are important in our development of self. They keep us aware of what we hold to be important. We celebrate birthdays because the day my child arrived in the world is unforgettable. We celebrate Memorial Day because war's devastation and destruction should never be forgotten. We celebrate our anniversary because it was the beginning of a delightful amalgamation of two lives. Some traditions aren't so much celebrations as they are the way we live and why we live. We go to church every week because God is important and deserving of our worship. My sons kiss me after a meal to show me they appreciate what I do for them. My husband finds me when he enters the house to kiss me hello. And we never leave without saying goodbye. When we speak of traditions the term is often confused with conservative. Traditions make us who we are, whether we are conservative or not. They remind us of what we hold to be important. Traditions make us take the time to remember that the rush of life isn't what we are all about. I like my family's traditions, and I like who they tell me we are. ------------- Another family tradition is Guys' Night Out, Tuesdays. So the guys have gone off to be manly together and I am left at home to think and contemplate. It is such needed time for all of us. It is a great time for the guys to realize they need each other, and a time for me to realize I am not always needed. I enjoy time to be insignificant. It's relaxing.

Following a New Road

I am managing to waste some time fiddling with Blogger. Sometimes my mind needs to be empty to recover from the onslaught of all the other days. I cleaned house yesterday, actually I cleaned a room in my house, and it took all day. My back was so out of whack afterward that I had to spend some time on the couch. I am about to be extremely honest. Don't judge me. The room that I cleaned hadn't been cleaned in about two years. Yes, two years. We were going through all of that house remodeling rigamarole and if I cleaned I was just going to have to do it again. So I figured, why clean? Then once all of the remodeling was completed I needed to fix all of the things that broke during the remodel. Then I had to clean rooms that were more important in the scheme of things. So yesterday as I found sawdust under a shelf I realized it was from the electrical work we had had done about two years ago. My how time flies. I have been thinking lately that I need to do some house cleaning in my mind and soul as well. Sadly, time has flown spiritually as well, and I have felt like I have ignored God for all too long. I have cleaned the rooms that everyone sees, but the ones that aren't out front have been overlooked, occasionally dusted or swept, but not delved into with great intention. It is time to pull the furniture away from the walls, wash the interior with some strong cleaners, and hope I don't find too many creepy crawlies. I love the way the room looks now. It is so spacious and welcoming. It was a long, painful day to get there but the hard work was worth it. I hope to say the same of this new spiritual sojourn.

Beauty

The wind blows at 200 mph nearly constantly. It is dark more often than not. The temperatures rarely rise above freezing. It is the driest, coldest, most uninhabitable place on Earth. The continent that no one may claim for his own, where all nations have a right to belong, where penguins and seals are the only aborigines, is Antarctica. Antarctica would seem to most to be a forgotten wasteland of no use, but looking deeper one finds that it is a very important part of our planet. Research is going on there that looks into tiny atoms frozen in the ice from thousands of years ago. Water is frozen in icecaps, glaciers and icebergs, that if melted would flood much of the world. There is even beauty on Antarctica. The tsunami of 2004 was recorded there as icebergs moved and twisted with the impact causing a song of sorrow to be sung by the Earth itself. Plants grow part of the year, animals breed and raise their young, a volcano steams and hisses its warnings. It is not a wasteland after all. A friend of mine lost her sister this week to ALS. The sister struggled for years to continue living a life worthy to be called "life". As this disease grabbed hold of more and more of her abilities and strength, the sister wondered if she still mattered, if she still had any worth. I went to her memorial service yesterday. There were so many people there that they overflowed the room. The parking lot had to be extended to the front yard, and afterward it was tight squeezing through doorways and hallways as so many people talked and visited. She had affected people in the work world, her neighborhood, her church, and most recently in cyberspace. Even as she lay in bed destroyed by ALS, presumed by most to be a dark, forgotten wasteland, she showed her importance to the rest of the world. Hundreds of people were connected to her through her struggle with death and life. Just like Antarctica she had many qualities that made her needed here on Earth. It is so easy to look at your own life and only see the small picture. You can't see the people who would drown if you let go of your frozen waters. You can't know how an earthquake or tsunami that someone experiences may be noticed by you. The small moments of beauty in your life may be the only chance for survival that some young penguin has. God created His world with so many intricacies connecting it in important ways. Antarctica may look unimportant, undeserving, unworthy of our attention, but God gave it much importance and did not forget that it was needed, too. It is that way with each of us. God made each one of us to make a difference to those around us. We all need each other to survive, to enjoy this world, to be safe and comforted. If your life is looking dark, feeling cold, and the wind is blowing you over, remember that God made this time and place as well. Stand strong in the knowledge that you do make a difference. "There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working, but the same God works all of them in all men. Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good." 1 Corinthians 12:4-7 Use what God gave you to serve the common good, and don't ever forget that beauty shines brighter in darkness.