Panic

The grandparents have been to visit. My in-laws came on Friday and left yesterday, and my parents came Sunday evening and left this morning. We had a nice visit with everyone. Hubby and his dad nearly finished building the greenhouse. My dad and mom wanted to be lazy, so we just visited yesterday. We did manage a trip to WalMart to buy helmets and new bikes for the boys. #2 was very excited and could hardly wait for his dad and grandad to get back with them. The boys tore around the driveway while the extra kids were here, but after dinner they wanted to go to the neighborhood to ride. I was washing dinner dishes when #1 came in and asked if they could go riding. I yelled out, "Be sure to wear your helmet!" I thought that would be the end of it, but about 10 seconds later I started crying and could hardly breathe. I was having fears of accidents and all sorts of possible calamities run through my mind. I went in my room to pray, knowing that I can't watch his every move and go with him everywhere. My mom kept talking to me and trying to distract me, but after maybe 15-20 minutes I started crying and said I had to be in that neighborhood. It was the closest I have ever come to having a panic attack. We found the boys playing basketball with a neighbor and everything seemed fine. I walked a couple of loops around the subdivision, gave the boys my watch, and told them when to come home. I thought I would throw up. They came home safe and sound. This morning #2 wanted to go riding again. I have the walkie-talkie, so if anything happens I can get him. Driving a car is going to be horrible for me.